So yeah. Those are the things that I've been doing to prepare myself for the Peace Corps. And it's been really, really enjoyable.
Then again, I am not ashamed to admit that THIS IS ALL PART OF MY GRANDIOSE PLAN. Yes, I HAVE A PLAN. I ALWAYS HAVE A PLAN!!! And my plan, for the past few months, has been as follows:
1. Create a self-indulgent and mind-numbingly introspective routine.
2. Cut out anything that pushes me out of my comfort zone, especially any new activities.
3. Cocoon myself tightly.
4. Ignore the fact that I am moving to Senegal for over two years, because, ehh, whatever. I'll figure it out as I go along.... right? Right?
So by putting all of my effort into those steps -- coupled with the fact that I have now spent 15 months hanging out with toddlers for 9-10 hours a day, and even though I love them, I mean, that's a lot of talking to myself -- I thus ensured my complete and utter self-preparation for a big LIFE CHANGE. And it has totally worked! I am totally bored! I am so ready to leave and embark on a grand lifestyle change in a new place and a new job! Go me! I did it!
That being said, I have bought myself some sweet-mo new bags, sandals, and this weird neon skirt with peacocks on it. Yeah that's right. So there have been a few preparations.
But in the meantime, I'm doing the best I can to get the most out of my America. So I have been eating hot dogs and going to famous hamburger joints and watching each and every intense Winter Sunday Television event: The Golden Globes! The SAG awards! The Super Bowl! The Grammys! I have taught both babies how to sing "Black and Yellow," and I clarified my thoughts on Lady Gaga's egg! And tomorrow, I will surround myself with friends, eat pizza, drink red wine, and sing Korean karaoke until the sun comes up. THIS IS MY AMERICA.
Thus in conclusion:
America, I'm glad we've had such a great time together lately, but I think we need to go on a break. I know you were a little pissed at me that time I didn't register to vote, but frankly, you've had your asshole moments too (i.e. my lack of post-graduation job. Kyoto Protocol. Bristol Palin on Dancing with the Stars). I think we both knew, in our heart of hearts, that this break was inevitable. We both having some growing up to do.
I'm sure I will go to Senegal and learn so many things that you just never had the time to teach me! For instance, the Peace Corps recently sent me an email saying I might learn how to plant trees! Super awesome! I'll also probably learn how to be more accepting of other cultures, which means that when I come back to you, maybe I will be more open-minded to people different than me, like Michelle Bachmann.
I'm sure I'll end up missing you, America. I will miss your bull-headed ways and your casually multicultural restaurant menus. I will miss your scents, from the 'is it chocolate or pollution?' smell on the Brown Line to the weird yeasty smell of South Bend, Indiana. These longings will make our future relationship stronger. And let's face it, you're going to be a mess without me here. I wouldn't be surprised if your entire baking sector implodes because of its sudden lack of patronage. I've also heard the world may end in 2012, thus I ask: coincidence?!?
But this will be good for us. Yes. Can't you see that I'm becoming a little stir-crazy with you? It's my youth. You are so old. I am so young.
So please, release your bald-headed eagle talons from the bedazzled rope around my neck. It's time for me to fly. To Senegal. You stay here. You can even date around. You can date Mallory.
I love you, America. You will always have my heart, because I am a citizen of this country and an organ donor. Thank you especially for these last few beautiful months, and here is to 2 more lovely weeks.
WORD. Don't worry, future posts will actually be about Senegal, once I get there.
